I don’t think my parents really tried to live vicariously through me, seeing as that for the most part, they usually had their own living going on. If there was one venue that they might have been tempted to live vicariously through me, it would have been music, but i mean, they were and have always been far more successful as musicians then i will ever be, or hope or care to be. They’ve always been doing weekend gigs or mini tours in one way or another, with one band or another, or in this choir or that choir, or they had a solo or a duet they were preparing for, and while i think it made them happy to see me play music, i don’t think they got personal fulfillment through it. Teenage rob shauf may have disagreed with that assessment, but i mean, teenage rob shauf didn’t shower… who would trust that guy?
I would describe my parents attitude and actions towards me as being supportive, and there have been times when i’ve become painfully aware of the sacrifices they’ve made to support me. An example was when they gave me my honda civic because my old rust bucket wouldn’t of survived the trip to alberta when i needed to get out there to make money to help pay for the EP my band was going to record. I remember pulling over on the drive out there, and i was weeping because I was so blown away that they would go without a car in order to help me record a stupid CD. They may not have thought that my band was going to be world famous, but they knew that I thought that we would be, and they supported me in that.
Another time was when me and Diana got married, and seeing all the sacrifices my parents, as well as Diana’s parents, and our families and friends in general, made to make sure that we had a special day.
I could go on and on.
Parents everywhere! lead by example. be supportive, but don’t measure your success as a human on your children’s ability to succeed in areas that interest you. Take joy and have pride in the accomplishments of your children, and don’t forget to pursue your own personal development, because there is nothing more inspiring for your kids then seeing you do what you do best and continuing to get better at it! WOOT!